Breaking up is good to do
Issue #34
Former Daily Show producer Ben Karlin talks about his book, Things I’ve Learned from Women Who’ve Dumped Me
By Claire Zulkey
Published: December 1st, 2007 | 1:27pm
I’m not sure where I obtained this information, but I’d assumed that guys deal with being dumped by heading to a local dive bar, drinking boilermakers, and staring at (and/or punching) the wall — and then they’re fine the next morning. But apparently they learn something in the process. Who knew?
Ben Karlin, Emmy-winning former executive producer of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart and The Colbert Report and former editor of The Onion has decided that these learning experiences are worth sharing. To keep the lessons from getting too touchy-feely, he selected some of the funniest people on the planet to bare their souls in the anthology Things I’ve Learned from Women Who’ve Dumped Me. With an introduction from Jon Stewart, contributors like Stephen Colbert, Andy Richter, Bob Odenkirk, Neal Pollack, and Dan Savage share the nuggets of wisdom they learned from breaking up and heartache. Karlin talks here about his new project and what inspired him to go from the world of comedy to ... tragicomedy.
Are you and the contributors gearing up to hear back from any of these ex-girlfriends?
Are
you suggesting that there was an ulterior motive to writing these
stories — to “get back” at certain women and get the last word in for a
situation that may not have ended the way certain men would have liked?
Well, then, bravo to you, I say, bravo. You have cut to the heart of
the matter in your first question. Are you a wizard? Short answer: I
imagine some e-mail accounts or cell phones may receive surprise
visitations.
Were any of them forewarned of the book?
I
can’t speak for the others — I know that I did not forewarn my ex —
because I have not spoken to her nor seen her since we broke up. This
book, if she sees it, will be, I guess, a “fine how do you do?”
Which of the contributors’ stories could you most relate to?
Not
Dan Savage’s. Though it did make me completely understand how gay men
think about vagina. I would probably say Dan Vebber’s, because I had a
similarly harrowing first pass at losing my virginity ... er, trying to lose my virginity.
How did you pick your contributors? (Other than the ones you worked with at Comedy Central and The Onion).
In no particular order:
1. People I’ve worked with before and like.
2. People I’ve worked with before, don’t like but are funny.
3. People I hate but owe me something.
4. People who were gifted to me by high-ranking members
of the comedy politburo.
Plenty
of the writers have since gone on, from their dumpings, to acquire fame
and success. Do you think there was any element of revenge for them in
writing their essays, like “Ha ha, bitch, look where I am now!”?
No,
but I do think it is a hell of a lot easier to write about something
ages and ages hence, when you can tell things with a sigh or a laugh
then when there is fresh gaping bleeding wound where your heart used to
be. I think that goes for famous people and regular schmucks. (Though
to be fair, I neither know nor hang out with regular schmucks any more,
and I will vigorously litigate any claim to the contrary.)
What’s been the input from the current wives and girlfriends of the contributors?
The
most pronounced input was from Stephen Colbert’s wife … but you really
have to see the piece to understand what it was. Beyond that, I imagine
some people got into fights with their currents over it, some people
probably chose not to mention it among the battery of projects they are
involved in and maybe, like one or two, had a reasonable conversation
about it. Though this is all speculation, since I don’t dare ask.
What’s something that your ex-girlfriends might have learned from you?
Besides
things specific to me, like, “Ben Karlin is difficult, bordering on
impossible to be with,” you mean? I truly don’t know the answer to that
question. The thing that amazes and interests me about this subject is
that being in a relationship is like making music. You put yourself, or
your song out there, and how people interpret it isn’t always what you
intended. Sometimes they think it is better than it is. Sometimes
worse. And, if you are really, really fucking lucky, they get your
sound exactly as you hoped people would.
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